That Could Be Me
By Chiara Tibbitt
2020 has been an interesting year for many people, not just athletes. I have felt a stream of emotions since the beginning of March when everything began to unfold. At first, I was grateful for my health, scholarship, and family but upset about missing the end of my season. I then realized that there are other people in situations much worse than my own. People of color have been hit the hardest by COVID-19, especially those in cities where social distancing isn’t an option.
The unrest, protesting, and activism that has altered the country's atmosphere at the moment is very much appropriate. We have needed change for a very long time and hopefully, we are turning a corner and finally making a difference. I find it interesting that people are arguing against the movement “Black Lives Matter”, because it seems as though there is an issue with the people, not the actual cause. If the roles of oppression were reversed, the same people who believe the Black Lives Matter movement is “exaggerated” are the same people who think that reverse racism is possible and that an all lives matter movement should be created in an attempt to invalidate the BLM movement.
I am a biracial student athlete, and as a kid in Central New Jersey I was fortunate enough to grow up around several different races, backgrounds, and cultures. As a result, I was able to understand people with different accents and look beyond stereotypes without judging on a superficial level. I was blessed to have grown up this way, but as I enter new spaces, I begin to realize that many people did not grow up with this same exposure. I think it is silly that people will make fun of someone else's complexion for being too dark, but at the same time feel the need to get spray tans or use self-tanner every week. The thing that I have noticed most is that I was blind to all of these subconscious appropriations of black culture.
The issue of race goes back to HUNDREDS of years when white supremacy was created to validate the oppression of non-white people. Something interesting that has started to occur is the appropriation of black culture. People of other races take and use black culture for their own brands and publicity, but at the end of the day, none of them actually want to be black in America and go through the trauma that we face. The expectations that go along with being black in America are outraging when you see your counterparts of different races, who never even think of the scenarios where they would be targeted for their race. What makes the situation even worse is that our school systems, unfortunately, don't teach the full extent of our history, leaving children uneducated and misguided that the issue of race in America has already ended.
I have always been on teams and in sports since I was little. I have a big personality and I used to like to be the center of attention. Now, not so much. As I went through high school, I knew I would have a voice if I joined a club where a diverse group of people were organizing together to create events and programs to benefit the people of color within our small community.
I went on to Boston University where I struggled to find my voice Freshman year. The time commitments of basketball, study hall, classes, and the overall adjustment to college life kept me from attending events at my school where people looked like me. There needed to be a space for athletes of color, so that they felt supported and didn’t feel left out of the events on campus that they aren't able to make because of our busy schedules. Entering my sophomore year I knew that I wanted a club to be started within our athletic department to address racial issues and to create a space where student-athletes could feel safe enough to speak freely. Toward the middle of the 2019-2020 school year, we formed the group SAOC (student-athletes of color) with the help of my coach and other administrators. There were only a few of us in the beginning and we didn’t have many meetings, but there was interest present.
Since we have been in quarantine, we have had meetings every 1-2 weeks and have been planning some events for when schools open again. I launched our Instagram about 2 weeks ago and we have received an overwhelming amount of support from our athletic department. There have been more and more students who want to be involved and we are finally having meaningful discussions and making progress together. We’ve talked about the importance of self-education, instead of relying solely on your “black friends” to educate you. We also talked about the programming we can start to implement for Freshmen on biases and learning how to not take language for granted, including the importance of being politically correct when talking about these topics with people of different backgrounds. Our goal for this group is to not only create a safe space for athletes of color but also to create spaces for conversations around race and ensuring that we have those conversations that might be uncomfortable.
There is a time to educate each other and it has been tough to take on that role as well as being an activist while also staying mentally well during these events. When I saw the video of Ahmaud Arbery, heard the story of Breonna Taylor, and then watched the video of George Floyd losing his life at the hands of four cops and multiple civilians, I realized something.
It could have been me.
During the days following these overwhelming deaths, I didn't want to leave my house and I felt scared for my life whether I would be driving, shopping, or just running around my neighborhood. I dreamt of all the possible scenarios in which if I moved the wrong way or said something off, I could be the next person on the news and leave this world just for having a darker complexion. The pain that this created for me was immense, and I can’t imagine the pain many others have felt when they lost a relative or friend unjustly to the police. Though I felt almost incapacitated from the news, people bringing up things of George’s past to justify his murder, began to generate angry within me, and that anger has been formed into using my voice, for those who can’t be heard. Speaking up when necessary and making sure people are held accountable and realize that racism is not only in the South or perpetrated by white people, is necessary.
One positive thing among others is the realization that many of us have been complacent in society and have grown comfortable in our own spaces. Change is necessary throughout people’s homes, the way they speak, the way we educate, the way we treat black men and women, and the way we go about business globally. The support from my athletic program and from friends has been overwhelming, but it still isn't enough. People are beginning to lose their outrage and have become complacent again. We need to keep protesting, developing new strategies, signing petitions, donating, having difficult conversations, and listening to those whose voices need to be amplified. I am hopeful there will be change, but it needs to start within the larger system of our government and our foundation as a country.